Well, as I mentioned in my last post, I tend to spend more trying to save than not! Yesterday I proved it! I had a couple coupons that were going to expire today so I braved a trip to Walmart with the boys! Let me tell you, Keirnan will get excited about anything! I said we're going to Walmart and he throws up his arms and says "Walmart!!" Its the cutest, even had my neighbor laughing!
Anyway, I had a coupon for Will's shampoo, BOGO so that was a total good buy, and a coupon that actually didn't say "excludes trial sizes!" Well, that was for shave gel, so I found some marked on the shelf at $0.97 and the coupon was $1 off!! Wahoo, I'm getting something for free!! There were a few others, but nothing too exciting! So, here's the poo: Of course, with the boys, I can't really pay 100% attention at the register and yesterday was no exception! The shave gel rang up as $1.47!! So I ended up paying $0.47 for the stuff! Considering it was a travel size, plus it had a disposable razor with it, its still a good buy, so I'm not upset by this one.
But I just wanted to show how bad I am at the couponing game, since it proved to be a great example so soon after mentioning my inability to save money!! :P
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Friday, July 29, 2011
A Day in the Life...
Well, its only 1pm so I know you're asking how I can write this now when the day is barely half over. Well, its simple, I have the time and motivation and when the two combine I have to take advantage! lol
This morning we went to pick up the truck, which was in getting fixed at the post Firestone. Very nice guys there btw! They haven't once tried to oversell anything to me, and are honest with me! Even more, this morning the guy at the front counter was the guy who was there last week when I got the oil changed and found out what was wrong with the truck! He not only remembered me, but remembered our conversation!! So, after spending a disgusting amount of money, the truck is once again fixed!
Since the Firestone is right next to the Train park, Keirnan of course wanted to go play! lol It was pretty funny watching him decide if he was going to make a break for it! lol He was literally teetering between the van and the park! But, I told him if he was a good boy while we took the truck home and dropped off Will and Alyssa, we could go back for a little while to play before lunch! He's apparently at that age where he doesn't forget! He talked about the train the entire way home and about flipped out when we dropped the Coles off thinking we were stopping there! Needless to say the half hour at the park, playing on the train, was a success!!
It was lunchtime before we left so we stopped at McDonald's on the way home and brought home some lunch! James enjoyed his fries, I enjoyed my catchup only cheeseburger, and Keirnan had a regular cheeseburger, with all the stuff on it!! He ate it without a problem, though the first bite did cause an interesting face! I am just so stinkin' happy he isn't as picky as I am!!
James is taking a nap right now and Keirnan has decided a nap isn't needed today, he is coloring instead! He is coloring his train pictures, go figure!! The boy is obsessed with trains! I am puttering on the computer and working on planning our vacation in December! I am so excited that the way the drive down is working out, we can stop for a day in Huntsville, AL!! Keirnan loves "spaceships," so I think he'll love the Space and Rocket Center as much as I did when I was a kid!
This evening we were going to order pizza, but since we ate out I think we are going to have fish sticks instead. Ok, the boys will have them, and I will have popcorn shrimp! Its the Gorton's frozen stuff, so easy to make and not much clean up either, but they are great to have in the house for days where I'm just not feeling good, or like today, where I don't want to spend the extra money to 'eat out' twice in a single day!!
I am not the best at couponing or even saving, I have a tendency to actually spend more when I actively try to save! But I do try and the Gorton's, while not the cheapest, are much cheaper at a couple bucks per box (3-5 meals) than the $10-15 I would spend on pizza tonight, which would last for dinner tonight and lunch tomorrow!
Well, the boys are now in bed for the night, so I guess I can say how the evening went. lol It was crazy! I swear I only get a good morning or a good evening! James didn't stay down for his afternoon nap long, so he got a total nap time today of maybe an hour instead of his usual 2-2.5 hours and was grouchy by dinner time. He did love his introduction to fish though! (Even if it was processed fried stuff!) He ate about 2 fish sticks, plus half a tub of carrots mixed with rice cereal!
We attempted to vacuum the downstairs this afternoon also, which was a mess considering how small the room is! James loves to chase the vacuum and with Keirnan "helping" I just can't go fast enough to stay ahead of him! Needless to say, in this tiny room I had to stop and move James about 5 times!! (Not exaggerating!) Poor Keirnan, I ended up telling him to sit on the couch and stay out of the way while I finished. To make up for it though, I let him do part of the stairs, which he loved!
So, at least the living room and the bottom half of the stairs got vacuumed. I also got 2 loads of laundry done, have one in the washer, and one ready to go! I got the trash out, and the kitchen cleaned up a bit! I would like to get the diaper pail emptied, but that might have to wait until the morning since its already dark out and I don't want to fumble down my front stairs to get it into the trash can! :P
I love productive days! Tomorrow we are going to Walmart, which is always an adventure with both boys! But, I have a few things I need to pick up! I try to look at it as an adventure while knowing ahead of time exactly what I need and having a game plan for getting through the store!
Well, that's a day in my life! Nothing amazingly exciting, but I do love it! Now, off to enjoy my evening me time!
This morning we went to pick up the truck, which was in getting fixed at the post Firestone. Very nice guys there btw! They haven't once tried to oversell anything to me, and are honest with me! Even more, this morning the guy at the front counter was the guy who was there last week when I got the oil changed and found out what was wrong with the truck! He not only remembered me, but remembered our conversation!! So, after spending a disgusting amount of money, the truck is once again fixed!
Since the Firestone is right next to the Train park, Keirnan of course wanted to go play! lol It was pretty funny watching him decide if he was going to make a break for it! lol He was literally teetering between the van and the park! But, I told him if he was a good boy while we took the truck home and dropped off Will and Alyssa, we could go back for a little while to play before lunch! He's apparently at that age where he doesn't forget! He talked about the train the entire way home and about flipped out when we dropped the Coles off thinking we were stopping there! Needless to say the half hour at the park, playing on the train, was a success!!
It was lunchtime before we left so we stopped at McDonald's on the way home and brought home some lunch! James enjoyed his fries, I enjoyed my catchup only cheeseburger, and Keirnan had a regular cheeseburger, with all the stuff on it!! He ate it without a problem, though the first bite did cause an interesting face! I am just so stinkin' happy he isn't as picky as I am!!
James is taking a nap right now and Keirnan has decided a nap isn't needed today, he is coloring instead! He is coloring his train pictures, go figure!! The boy is obsessed with trains! I am puttering on the computer and working on planning our vacation in December! I am so excited that the way the drive down is working out, we can stop for a day in Huntsville, AL!! Keirnan loves "spaceships," so I think he'll love the Space and Rocket Center as much as I did when I was a kid!
This evening we were going to order pizza, but since we ate out I think we are going to have fish sticks instead. Ok, the boys will have them, and I will have popcorn shrimp! Its the Gorton's frozen stuff, so easy to make and not much clean up either, but they are great to have in the house for days where I'm just not feeling good, or like today, where I don't want to spend the extra money to 'eat out' twice in a single day!!
I am not the best at couponing or even saving, I have a tendency to actually spend more when I actively try to save! But I do try and the Gorton's, while not the cheapest, are much cheaper at a couple bucks per box (3-5 meals) than the $10-15 I would spend on pizza tonight, which would last for dinner tonight and lunch tomorrow!
Well, the boys are now in bed for the night, so I guess I can say how the evening went. lol It was crazy! I swear I only get a good morning or a good evening! James didn't stay down for his afternoon nap long, so he got a total nap time today of maybe an hour instead of his usual 2-2.5 hours and was grouchy by dinner time. He did love his introduction to fish though! (Even if it was processed fried stuff!) He ate about 2 fish sticks, plus half a tub of carrots mixed with rice cereal!
We attempted to vacuum the downstairs this afternoon also, which was a mess considering how small the room is! James loves to chase the vacuum and with Keirnan "helping" I just can't go fast enough to stay ahead of him! Needless to say, in this tiny room I had to stop and move James about 5 times!! (Not exaggerating!) Poor Keirnan, I ended up telling him to sit on the couch and stay out of the way while I finished. To make up for it though, I let him do part of the stairs, which he loved!
So, at least the living room and the bottom half of the stairs got vacuumed. I also got 2 loads of laundry done, have one in the washer, and one ready to go! I got the trash out, and the kitchen cleaned up a bit! I would like to get the diaper pail emptied, but that might have to wait until the morning since its already dark out and I don't want to fumble down my front stairs to get it into the trash can! :P
I love productive days! Tomorrow we are going to Walmart, which is always an adventure with both boys! But, I have a few things I need to pick up! I try to look at it as an adventure while knowing ahead of time exactly what I need and having a game plan for getting through the store!
Well, that's a day in my life! Nothing amazingly exciting, but I do love it! Now, off to enjoy my evening me time!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Song Challenge Days 13-15
Day 13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
OK, the song isn't as much the guilty pleasure as the video! lol I liked the movie, but this part is my favorite and I can watch it a thousand times, whereas the movie got old quick! I love the song, actually the entire soundtrack, which is so far out of my usual tastes, so even that could be my guilty pleasure! I rocked out to it while pregnant with Keirnan and now its a favorite of his in the car! So, here is Muse's SuperMassive Black Hole in the Twilight movie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPNEUzvPMLM
Day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love Would you believe this was a relatively easy one!? I love this song and it really moves me. I am working on finding my place with God. Its been a long and hard road this year, but one I fell is important for me. So, here is Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSTJqhlDQrY&feature=related
Day 15 - a song that describes you
There are a couple songs that I hear on the radio and think, that is me! Of course, when you are actually trying to remember them, you can't think of a single one! lol So, I'm sure I'll hear something on the radio tomorrow that will make me say oh I should have picked this one, but for now this is what I've got! I am the thousand contradictions he mentions in this song and so many more! Brad Paisley's She's Everything!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCjXaEbrLdw&feature=artistob&playnext=1&list=TL-yeIN2gBHKc
OK, the song isn't as much the guilty pleasure as the video! lol I liked the movie, but this part is my favorite and I can watch it a thousand times, whereas the movie got old quick! I love the song, actually the entire soundtrack, which is so far out of my usual tastes, so even that could be my guilty pleasure! I rocked out to it while pregnant with Keirnan and now its a favorite of his in the car! So, here is Muse's SuperMassive Black Hole in the Twilight movie!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPNEUzvPMLM
Day 14 - a song that no one would expect you to love Would you believe this was a relatively easy one!? I love this song and it really moves me. I am working on finding my place with God. Its been a long and hard road this year, but one I fell is important for me. So, here is Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HSTJqhlDQrY&feature=related
Day 15 - a song that describes you
There are a couple songs that I hear on the radio and think, that is me! Of course, when you are actually trying to remember them, you can't think of a single one! lol So, I'm sure I'll hear something on the radio tomorrow that will make me say oh I should have picked this one, but for now this is what I've got! I am the thousand contradictions he mentions in this song and so many more! Brad Paisley's She's Everything!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCjXaEbrLdw&feature=artistob&playnext=1&list=TL-yeIN2gBHKc
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Song Challenge Days 10-12
Day 10 - a song that makes you fall asleep Yes, another The Sound of Music song! lol Partly because I love the movie, and partly because my friend Kris's kids are in the play coming up here in town and we've been talking about it a lot. Either way, this is a song that runs through my head many nights as I am heading to bed! So Long, Farewell.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJjBvK_2Wjo
Day 11 - a song from your favorite band
This was a very hard question since I listen to so many different performers and they all have songs I love and songs I hate! But for now at least, this band I am in love with, Steel Magnolia, and this song is my favorite!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0N2v9gRNcrg
Day 12 - a song from a band you hate
This is a band I really liked until they opened mouth and inserted foot! After their bad publicity from it, its like they just couldn't pull together and make good music any longer! (I have never been a hater of the music just because I dislike the artist- Britney Spears is a great example! I've never liked her, but I've liked her music!) Dixie Chicks really screwed their music career up by their comments toward Toby Keith's Angry American song and while they are allowed to have their opinion, the way they said it and the timing was very poorly done. Dixie Chicks "Cowboy Take Me Away"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hntXAO_Rq7c&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJjBvK_2Wjo
Day 11 - a song from your favorite band
This was a very hard question since I listen to so many different performers and they all have songs I love and songs I hate! But for now at least, this band I am in love with, Steel Magnolia, and this song is my favorite!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0N2v9gRNcrg
Day 12 - a song from a band you hate
This is a band I really liked until they opened mouth and inserted foot! After their bad publicity from it, its like they just couldn't pull together and make good music any longer! (I have never been a hater of the music just because I dislike the artist- Britney Spears is a great example! I've never liked her, but I've liked her music!) Dixie Chicks really screwed their music career up by their comments toward Toby Keith's Angry American song and while they are allowed to have their opinion, the way they said it and the timing was very poorly done. Dixie Chicks "Cowboy Take Me Away"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hntXAO_Rq7c&feature=related
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Potty Training Fun!
So, last year before James was born, Keirnan had started showing the first signs you look for to start potty training- he was telling me when he went in his diaper! And then, James came and Daddy deployed and he stopped telling me! I figured he'd start again within a couple months, but nope! 8 months later and he still isn't doing it! BUT, last night he did start something new!
First, we got him a potty and started introducing him to it back then since we thought he was heading down that road! So, his potty has patiently been waiting in my bathroom most of the past year! It's apparently a great seat while I go potty because God forbid I get any privacy! lol
Then, last night Keirnan pulled his pants off, ran upstairs holding himself and repeatedly saying pee pee, and I ran after him to his potty while carrying the computer because we were on Skype with Will!! So I took his diaper off and he sat on his potty, and sat, and sat, and sat! Nothing happened, but I was so proud that he thought to do it!
Tonight he did it again, and again he sat, and sat, and sat, etc. lol We even brought the potty downstairs with us and I let him run around naked for about an hour, but nothing happened! I am still so happy and proud that he is even doing this! I know its still a long way off, but its a good first step!
And I know I have to be patient, and really I am. Actually, I am worried about doing it because of various things:
1. Will comes home in about 3-4 months, I am figuring my luck will be that Keirnan starts to really be ready right before then and its going to set him back again!
2. How do I potty train him with James getting into everything!? lol
3. Do I have to potty train him!? I mean I really don't want him to grow up!! I don't mind the diapers most days!! lol
First, we got him a potty and started introducing him to it back then since we thought he was heading down that road! So, his potty has patiently been waiting in my bathroom most of the past year! It's apparently a great seat while I go potty because God forbid I get any privacy! lol
Then, last night Keirnan pulled his pants off, ran upstairs holding himself and repeatedly saying pee pee, and I ran after him to his potty while carrying the computer because we were on Skype with Will!! So I took his diaper off and he sat on his potty, and sat, and sat, and sat! Nothing happened, but I was so proud that he thought to do it!
Tonight he did it again, and again he sat, and sat, and sat, etc. lol We even brought the potty downstairs with us and I let him run around naked for about an hour, but nothing happened! I am still so happy and proud that he is even doing this! I know its still a long way off, but its a good first step!
And I know I have to be patient, and really I am. Actually, I am worried about doing it because of various things:
1. Will comes home in about 3-4 months, I am figuring my luck will be that Keirnan starts to really be ready right before then and its going to set him back again!
2. How do I potty train him with James getting into everything!? lol
3. Do I have to potty train him!? I mean I really don't want him to grow up!! I don't mind the diapers most days!! lol
Song Challenge Days 7-9
Day 07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
Easy! My wedding of course!! So, though we didn't get to actually dance at our wedding, our song was John Michael Montgomery's version of I Swear! I'll even give you a double header! The second one was the song we came back up the aisle to, Nick Lowe's I knew the Bride (When She Used to Rock and Roll)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgXWXP-Ooz8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kn1CXbf2xF8
Day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
Yes, I recognise my utter nerdiness, but this is one of my favorite songs to sing! lol Do Ri Me from The Sound of Music!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dpGmAc3kMk
Day 09 - a song that you can dance toIn homage to the nights we spent at the Rockin' Ranch, Cammack and I finally figured out the moves to it just in time for graduation, and now 6 years later, I can't remember a step! :P Rednex Cotton Eye Joe!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddgyg_5FF_0
Easy! My wedding of course!! So, though we didn't get to actually dance at our wedding, our song was John Michael Montgomery's version of I Swear! I'll even give you a double header! The second one was the song we came back up the aisle to, Nick Lowe's I knew the Bride (When She Used to Rock and Roll)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgXWXP-Ooz8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kn1CXbf2xF8
Day 08 - a song that you know all the words to
Yes, I recognise my utter nerdiness, but this is one of my favorite songs to sing! lol Do Ri Me from The Sound of Music!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dpGmAc3kMk
Day 09 - a song that you can dance toIn homage to the nights we spent at the Rockin' Ranch, Cammack and I finally figured out the moves to it just in time for graduation, and now 6 years later, I can't remember a step! :P Rednex Cotton Eye Joe!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddgyg_5FF_0
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Song Challenge Days 4-6
Yes, I am cheating and doing this much faster than the 30 days! I know I won't get a chance to do this every day, so I'm doing a little as I get a chance! lol
Day 04 - a song that makes you sad
This is another easy one for me. This is a song I associate with my sister. I always thought of it as my dad's song for her. I don't know if he thinks so too, but it fits! So, here is Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxPj3GAYYZ0
Day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
This is another easy one, Trace Adkins' Arlington. Its a very beautiful and moving song in itself, it has extra meaning to those who've been blessed to have known one or more of the many heros burried there. A very good friend from college died in Iraq on June 7, 2005. This too is a song that make me sad, but without fail, I think of 2LT John S. Vaughan. He was more than a friend, like a brother to me, in a time of my life that I needed him most. He always was there with a sholder to cry on and could make me laugh when I needed it most! I won't sit here and say we had an easy relationship, because we hated each other for almost 2 years too! But, its the friendship that developed that means so much! I miss you John!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGzuvmut3Hs
Day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
This song reminds me of going out on my grandparents boat as a child, (which I admit, there sadly aren't that many memories left!) all my scuba diving trips as a teenager, and how much I miss those easy days out on a boat enjoying the Gulf with my family and friends. So, here's to my own little piece of paradise via Zac Brown Band and Jimmy Buffet!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CDLHjvf-QU&feature=related
Day 04 - a song that makes you sad
This is another easy one for me. This is a song I associate with my sister. I always thought of it as my dad's song for her. I don't know if he thinks so too, but it fits! So, here is Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxPj3GAYYZ0
Day 05 - a song that reminds you of someone
This is another easy one, Trace Adkins' Arlington. Its a very beautiful and moving song in itself, it has extra meaning to those who've been blessed to have known one or more of the many heros burried there. A very good friend from college died in Iraq on June 7, 2005. This too is a song that make me sad, but without fail, I think of 2LT John S. Vaughan. He was more than a friend, like a brother to me, in a time of my life that I needed him most. He always was there with a sholder to cry on and could make me laugh when I needed it most! I won't sit here and say we had an easy relationship, because we hated each other for almost 2 years too! But, its the friendship that developed that means so much! I miss you John!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGzuvmut3Hs
Day 06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
This song reminds me of going out on my grandparents boat as a child, (which I admit, there sadly aren't that many memories left!) all my scuba diving trips as a teenager, and how much I miss those easy days out on a boat enjoying the Gulf with my family and friends. So, here's to my own little piece of paradise via Zac Brown Band and Jimmy Buffet!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CDLHjvf-QU&feature=related
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Song Challege days 1-3
Day 1- Favorite song
My favorite song usually changes as my mood changes, but there is always a song I go back to in each mood! But, with that said, I am saying my favorite song is the one that most often pops into my head or that I randomly start singing more often than others. So, my favorite song is Steve Holy's Good Morning Beautiful.
http://youtu.be/UHUxogmXob4
Day 2- Least Favorite song
My least favorite song was hard because I know a lot of songs I don't really like, but none that I totally abhor! But, this one will probably be a surprise to many people, especially coming from a military wife- I cannot stand Alan Jackson's Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning!! While its a nice song, they played it so often for so long, that I truely cannot listen to it anymore! The minute it comes on the radio I still change the station!!
http://youtu.be/fvj6zdWLUuk
Day 3- Song that makes me Happy
This is my first truely easy song to pick, no thought required! Louis Armstrong's What a Wonderful World. It not only is a beautiful song, but it brings back some great memories- Grand travels my first Grandie year!! No matter how hard a day I'm having, it reminds me how blessed I am and puts a smile on my face!
http://youtu.be/SzJY96m3lkg
My favorite song usually changes as my mood changes, but there is always a song I go back to in each mood! But, with that said, I am saying my favorite song is the one that most often pops into my head or that I randomly start singing more often than others. So, my favorite song is Steve Holy's Good Morning Beautiful.
http://youtu.be/UHUxogmXob4
Day 2- Least Favorite song
My least favorite song was hard because I know a lot of songs I don't really like, but none that I totally abhor! But, this one will probably be a surprise to many people, especially coming from a military wife- I cannot stand Alan Jackson's Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning!! While its a nice song, they played it so often for so long, that I truely cannot listen to it anymore! The minute it comes on the radio I still change the station!!
http://youtu.be/fvj6zdWLUuk
Day 3- Song that makes me Happy
This is my first truely easy song to pick, no thought required! Louis Armstrong's What a Wonderful World. It not only is a beautiful song, but it brings back some great memories- Grand travels my first Grandie year!! No matter how hard a day I'm having, it reminds me how blessed I am and puts a smile on my face!
http://youtu.be/SzJY96m3lkg
Monday, July 11, 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Harry Potter and the truck
So, as its a week before the final movie comes out, I have of course, been re-reading the book! And today I am watching the previous movies on ABC Family. And I came upon an oops in the magical world!! In Prisoner of Azkaban, Lupin did not know Sirius wasn't the secret keeper for Harry's parents. But in the Deathly Hallows, a letter written to Sirius from Lilly says Lupin had just visited. For Lupin to have visited them while in hiding, the real secret keeper would have needed to give him the location, meaning Pettygrew! So, oops!!
Now, when am I going to get to see this upcoming movie!? I actually haven't a clue! I have both boys in the CDC on Friday but I have to pick them up at 1pm, and the earliest I could find is 11am. Its a 2.5 hours long movie, plus the inevitable previews! So, when do I get to see my movie?!
Now, what am I doing with this time all to myself- a first in months. (OK, well I do get my monthly couple hours out one evening for girls night out, usually just dinner!) But this is a block of 4 hours all to myself!! Well, I am going to be doing truck upkeep! Yes, my me time is actually doing yet another thing that needs to be done, instead of just relaxing and taking some time for me! Maybe I'll get lucky enough to get time to run by Walmart!
I told Will I plan on disappearing for a couple days once he gets home, and I actually mean it! I'm too cheap to actually go stay somewhere, so I'll of course stay home, but I plan on maybe going to a movie and dinner with just me, myself, and I! Maybe I'm harsh for looking most forward to my husband coming home from his deployment for the me time, but really, I need it! And this movie and my not getting to even find a time to go see it is just one way of showing how much I need it!
Please, don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart, and I do not resent that my husband is gone. I knew what I was getting into when I married him, and am so proud of him! But, this deployment has been hard on me. It has shown me I don't really know who I am. I love being His wife. I love being Their mom, but who is that person? I have never had a chance to find out, and frankly I really want to know! Because the person I grew up planning to become is gone. The person I was in high school is gone. The person I was in college even is gone. I am a very different person! I realized this in various interactions with long time friends over the past few months. Its a blog I've thought about writing every day, but its one that I know is going to hurt. Its going to hurt me to put these feelings into writing, and its going to probably hurt the people its about, if they even read my blog! I don't think they do!
So, maybe one day I'll get a chance to figure out who I am, and stop living each day waiting for my life to start! Because I am missing so much just waiting, and I really want to be living!!
Now, when am I going to get to see this upcoming movie!? I actually haven't a clue! I have both boys in the CDC on Friday but I have to pick them up at 1pm, and the earliest I could find is 11am. Its a 2.5 hours long movie, plus the inevitable previews! So, when do I get to see my movie?!
Now, what am I doing with this time all to myself- a first in months. (OK, well I do get my monthly couple hours out one evening for girls night out, usually just dinner!) But this is a block of 4 hours all to myself!! Well, I am going to be doing truck upkeep! Yes, my me time is actually doing yet another thing that needs to be done, instead of just relaxing and taking some time for me! Maybe I'll get lucky enough to get time to run by Walmart!
I told Will I plan on disappearing for a couple days once he gets home, and I actually mean it! I'm too cheap to actually go stay somewhere, so I'll of course stay home, but I plan on maybe going to a movie and dinner with just me, myself, and I! Maybe I'm harsh for looking most forward to my husband coming home from his deployment for the me time, but really, I need it! And this movie and my not getting to even find a time to go see it is just one way of showing how much I need it!
Please, don't get me wrong, I love my boys with all my heart, and I do not resent that my husband is gone. I knew what I was getting into when I married him, and am so proud of him! But, this deployment has been hard on me. It has shown me I don't really know who I am. I love being His wife. I love being Their mom, but who is that person? I have never had a chance to find out, and frankly I really want to know! Because the person I grew up planning to become is gone. The person I was in high school is gone. The person I was in college even is gone. I am a very different person! I realized this in various interactions with long time friends over the past few months. Its a blog I've thought about writing every day, but its one that I know is going to hurt. Its going to hurt me to put these feelings into writing, and its going to probably hurt the people its about, if they even read my blog! I don't think they do!
So, maybe one day I'll get a chance to figure out who I am, and stop living each day waiting for my life to start! Because I am missing so much just waiting, and I really want to be living!!
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